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    Top 10 Most Pants-Crappingly Awesome Video Game Secrets

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    Top 10 Most Pants-Crappingly Awesome Video Game Secrets

    Post by SPADEZ on Sun Aug 01, 2010 10:21 pm

    Have you ever been playing a video game, minding your own
    business, when something so awesome happens that you want to tell
    everyone you know about it? But then you come to find that no one gives a
    shit? Well, we feel your pain, and as a result, we have compiled this
    list of ten of the most awesome things that ever happened in a video
    game. Feel free to peruse the list an take solace in the fact that there
    are, in fact, other people that are nearly as nerdy as you are!

    10. NBA Jam Tournament Edition– Play as Bill/Hillary Clinton,
    George Clinton, Al Gore, Prince Charles, the Beastie Boys, DJ Jazzy Jeff
    & the Fresh Prince

    Bill "The Thrill" Clinton taking it to the proverbial hole yet again.

    Never before and never again since has there been a secret character
    list that includes a cast as diverse as the President, Vice President
    and First Lady of the United States, George “P Funk Clinton”, and the GD
    Fresh Prince of Bel-Air. While playing as these characters doesn’t
    dramatically change the overall experience, there is a certain surreal
    quality to seeing Hillary Clinton perform a windmill slam-dunk from the
    free-throw line in DJ Jazzy Jeff’s face while Al Gore sets the pick on
    Will Smith.

    9. Resident Evil 2 – Alternate play-through

    I would rather eat a glass bottle of tobacco juice than enter a town full of zombies.

    Resident Evil games are known for their secret weapons and characters,
    but perhaps the coolest secret ever in an RE game has to do with the
    alternate play-through in Resident Evil 2. After completing the game as
    either Claire or Leon, you can then play a whole new scenario as the
    opposite character following in the footsteps of and occasionally
    crossing paths with your original character. This made for four totally
    unique gameplay experiences in an already awesome game, something that
    is still unprecedented today.
    8. GTA San Andreas/Tomb Raider – Hot Coffee mod, Nude Raider patch

    This is offensive, but carjacking, stealing and murder is significantly less so. I guess.

    Both of these cheats require a little bit of work on the part of the
    gamer, and as a result, only the horniest of gamers have ever gone to
    the trouble. But that doesn’t change the political shit-storm that
    resulted from the discovery of these two cheats, one that unlocks a
    cartoony and relatively harmless sex minigame, and one that unclothes
    what was at one time the biggest sex symbol in gaming. It’s funny that
    people would take such great offense at a little bit of nakedness in
    lieu of the graphically violent and depraved cop-killing, gang-banging
    gameplay of GTA, but we live in a repressed nation. And as for Lara
    Croft, it’s not as if Tomb Raider was the success it was because of the

    7. Final Fantasy VII – Ultimate weapons

    This one right here is a real controller-snapper.

    Challenging boss fights are nothing new to Final Fantasy enthusiasts,
    but the optional Ultimate Weapon battles in FFVII may go down in history
    as one of the most ridiculously impossible fights in gaming history.
    Each of the three Ultimate Weapons is capable of decimating your entire
    party in seconds, if you can even find them in the first place. You have
    to be so overpowered and prepared that the awesome rewards you get for
    defeating the Ultimate Weapons aren’t particularly useful in the end, as
    even the game’s final boss will seem like a bitch in comparison. But
    the sense of accomplishment you will get from taking them on and winning
    is priceless. Your hours, perhaps even days of hard work will be well
    worth the effort, despite having virtually no value or importance in the
    real world.

    6. Double Dragon – Billy Vs. Jimmy

    Two emo pansies having a slap fight at the Good Charlotte concert.

    Double Dragon was one of the earliest brawlers that let you and a friend
    work together to beat the shit out of wave after wave of mindless enemy
    thugs, hell bent on stopping you from saving the babe from the evil
    criminal mastermind. (Nearly every game in the 1980s was about saving
    babes, you’ll remember.) Billy and Jimmy really had to work together as a
    team to make it to the end, so imagine your surprise when there’s only
    one babe to go around and she’s not into the whole tag-team thing. This
    forces you to face off against one another in a battle for Marion’s love
    and the coinciding bragging rights that come along with being the
    ultimate Dragon Master. So much for the whole “bros before hos” thing.
    5. Metal Gear Solid – Psycho Mantis reads your mind

    Yes I do, thanks for asking. Wait, HOW THE F**K DO YOU KNOW THAT?!

    Every once in awhile a game will break the fourth wall and address the
    player directly, though never in such a bizarre and initially unnerving
    way as Psycho Mantis, a boss character in Metal Gear Solid. When I first
    encountered him, he said something to me about liking Castlevania and
    Suikoden, as well as making mention of how wise I was for saving often. I
    was completely weirded out until I realized that he had “read” this
    information off of my memory card. Just to be more of a dick, he then
    proceeds to “read” your controller inputs, dodging your attacks nine
    times out of ten, although switching controller ports mixes him up and
    makes him a sitting duck. To this day, I haven’t been as taken aback by a
    game as I was the first time I battled Psycho Mantis, an experience
    that made me question the amount of time I was spending playing games in
    the first place.

    4. Mortal Kombat – Challenged by Reptile

    You have officially earned the honor of being torn in half by a cheap-ass opponent!

    Back before the internets were as commonplace as they are now, secrets
    traveled by word of mouth in the schoolyard, and required one to see
    with one’s own eyes before believing them. One such secret involved a
    character called “Reptile” that would randomly challenge players in the
    game everyone was already talking about for its insanely gory
    “fatalities”, Mortal Kombat. Basically, you’d get little hints here and
    there that didn’t make much sense at first, like one that read “Look to
    la Luna”. Later, when one was fighting on the “The Pit” stage, you might
    see an object pass by the moon (La Luna, duh). This was your cue to
    perform a double flawless fatality (no easy task) so you could have the
    pleasure of getting your ass kicked by a poison spitting lizard man.
    Awesome! Then you get to go tell all your nerdy little friends about it,
    who of course will not believe you.

    3. Metroid – Suitless Samus

    I still don't understand what the shoulder pads are for. Image By Ivan Flores

    Try being a young boy and finding out that your badass missile-launching
    bounty hunter that just pwned the space pirates and rid the universe of
    Metroids was A F**KING CHICK! This kind of thing just didn’t happen,
    and the fact that there was no mention of it prior raised many a
    question, not the least of which was “Is it cool/fun to pretend to be a
    hot babe for a few hours out of the day?” How many tyrannies in their
    late twenties are there out in the world today that are still searching
    for the answer to this question, all thanks to Nintendo and Samus Aran?
    Also, just who in the goddamn hell is “Justin Bailey” anyway?
    2. Castlevania: Symphony of the Night – Castle Flip

    Dancin' on the ceiling like a vampire Lionel Richie in Hell.

    A few sad losers may have missed this one, which would have resulted in
    missing out on half of the entire game. Essentially you have to equip an
    item called “holy glasses” before entering the final boss fight, which
    will allow you to see the evil force that is secretly controlling your
    enemy. Defeat this and you unlock an inverted version of the entirety of
    Dracula’s castle, which is really a marvel of modern game design to
    work both right side up and upside down without the player having ever
    guessed that it was built that way. The inverted castle is no repeat
    either, but rather, a more twisted version with different, tougher
    enemies and bosses to battle against. The day this secret was
    discovered, the collective nerdgasm was so powerful that the very Earth
    trembled, causing minor tremors worldwide and making a vase fall off the
    fireplace mantle at Bobby Wilcox’s mom’s house in Long Island, New
    York, which was, according to Bobby, “totally not his fault”.

    1. Super Mario Bros., Super Mario World, Super Smash Bros. Brawl – Warp pipes, minus world, Mario masks, Mario Vs. Sonic/Snake

    I would be remiss if I didn’t mention some of the many secrets that have
    been brought to us by our dear old friend Mario. Warp zones may not
    seem like anything special today, but back in 1985, stumbling across the
    warp pipes to new levels was a particularly thrilling experience. In
    particular, the warp pipe leading to the mysterious and ultimately
    unbeatable “minus level”. By the time Super Mario World came out for the
    NES, the non-linear formula had been perfected to allow for greater
    exploration. So much so, in fact, that if anyone actually went to the
    trouble of mastering 100% of the game, you would find that all the
    koopas in the game are now wearing Mario masks! Creepy.

    Mario & Sonic: Responsible for more crappy fan art than anything since Star Wars!

    As for the upcoming Super Smash Bros. Brawl, it’s no secret that Mario
    and Sonic will finally get to battle it out against one another,
    something that gamers have been waiting years for. (And no, Mario and
    Sonic at the Olympic Games does not count for reason of sucking
    horribly.) Not to mention the fact that Snake from MGS will also be
    playable. But since Nintendo has never been known to blow their wad of
    secrets before the game is on the shelf, what other surprises remain to
    be found? Pray to J it isn’t another nude code/patch, because as lovable
    as fat, mustachioed plumbers and hedgehogs with “attitude” may be, most
    people have little or no desire to see them naked. I hope.
    Source: http://www.craveonline.com/gaming/article/top-10-most-pants-crappingly-awesome-video-game-secrets-66525/

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    Re: Top 10 Most Pants-Crappingly Awesome Video Game Secrets

    Post by iRaz on Mon Aug 02, 2010 12:14 am

    my favorites ones are the mgs psycho mantis mind reader and the san andreas one


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